“All of a sudden, the tears flow”: Flavie Flament talks about how she managed to remember the rapes she suffered

This Wednesday, April 24, the show In Olivier’s eyes returned with host Flavie Flament to the rapes of which she was the victim by photographer David Hamilton when she was only 13 years old. Affected by post-traumatic amnesia, she explains that it was only at the age of 35, after the death of her grandfather, that these crimes came back to her memory.

At this time, Flavie Flament then had the image of a white wall, a blue sky and a green fabric accompanied by a “sale smell of damp“. “The terrible thing is that these images are accompanied by physical sensations, therefore emotions, but also sometimes smells and tastes.

Tormented, she therefore decides to consult a psychiatrist. Together, they look at his childhood photo album. At the very end, a photo falls out of the album and lands on the floor. A photo that was taken by David Hamilton. She had not forgotten that she had posed for the famous photographer but that day, the story came back to her face.

“Go ahead, dry yourself, your mother will be here soon”

Still during this show, Flavie Flament talks about some of the work she had to do in the months following the return of memories. The RTL host wanted above all to understand why her brain had hidden her memories from her for so long.

I look at my doctor, I have the photo in my hand and I hear myself saying these words: ‘He raped me’. And repeat them. I hold on to his gaze and suddenly the tears flow“, reports Flavie Flament who will manage to “recompose the film of a drama“.

So the white wall and blue sky matched what she saw when she was “lying on David Hamilton’s balcony“. And the green fabric smells of damp, “It was afterwards, in the bathroom, when he handed me the wet, disgusting, stinking towel and he said to me: ‘Go ahead, dry yourself, your mother will arrive soon’“, concludes Benjamin Castaldi’s ex.

“I have hope”

She then decided to have an MRI to see if any visible marks appeared. “Is there a sign?” she wonders. The results show atrophied seahorses, which prompts her to ask another question: could these images be used in a trial?

Flavie Flament then explains the limits of this process: the link cannot, for the moment, be established between these images and the trauma. “We see damage, but we don’t know what this damage was caused by” she adds.

Flavie Flament also explains that she is now subject to real problems on a daily basis: “My memory took a hit. I have a vulnerability in terms of memory, but resilience, a reassuring atmosphere and a form of healing allows, according to specialists, the hippocampus and the brain to regenerate. So I have hope“.